I’m a mum of two wonderful children who are now grown up.
When I turned 50, I realised something that changed my life.
For years, I had spent my time trying to be everything for everyone else – a better employee, a better mum, a better wife, a better daughter. I always put myself last.
Looking after my own health could always wait.
Until one day, it couldn’t.
By the time I reached 50, I was completely burnt out. I had lost my sense of purpose, my confidence and, most importantly, my joy. I was prescribed antidepressants because everything simply became too much.
At the same time, my body seemed to be falling apart.
Some days it was my back.
Other days, it was stomach pain.
I experienced joint pain, infrequent bowel movements or opposite upset stomach without reason, along with overwhelming fatigue. Looking back now, I realise that many of these symptoms started when I was around 44 years old.
I was entering perimenopause.
But I didn’t know it.
Whenever I searched for information, the focus was always on hot flushes and brain fog. I did have hot flushes, but they were usually mild and happened just before my menstrual cycle, so I assumed they were simply part of my monthly hormones.
Nobody explained that perimenopause could affect joints, digestion, mood, sleep, muscles, and so many other parts of the body.
I spent years trying to understand what was happening to me.
My back has also been part of my story for a very long time.
When I was 18, I was involved in a serious car accident that injured my spine. Growing up on a farm meant there was no such thing as “men’s work” or “women’s work” – there was simply work that needed to be done. Heavy lifting became part of everyday life, even though my back had already been damaged.
Later, I became a wife and a mother, and like so many women, I put everyone else’s needs before my own.
Only recently have I discovered how pregnancy, childbirth and years of poor posture can contribute to ongoing lower back pain.
For years, doctors told me that my X-rays looked normal.
Yet I was living with pain that sometimes became so severe I needed strong painkillers just to get through the day.
Everything started to change when I began studying to become a yoga teacher.
For the first time, I learned how posture, movement and muscle balance affect the spine. As I became more aware of my posture and corrected the way I moved, many of my back pain episodes became less frequent and less severe.
It wasn’t a miracle cure, but it gave me something I hadn’t had before – understanding.
Another challenge I faced was pelvic organ prolapse.
Years of digestive problems, combined with pregnancy and childbirth, eventually led to surgery.
Looking back, I wish someone had explained how important pelvic floor exercises are after having children. I eventually received physiotherapy, but because of long waiting lists, I waited over a year and a half after surgery before treatment began.
Today, there is far more information available, and with a physiotherapist’s guidance, many women can continue these exercises safely at home. My recovery is still a journey, but I am in a much better place than I was before.
That is one of the reasons 50 & Thriving exists.
This isn’t a website created by someone who believes she knows everything.
It’s created by a woman who has spent years searching for answers and wants to share what she learns along the way.
As I continue my qualifications in fitness, nutrition and yoga, I also continue learning about perimenopause, menopause and healthy ageing.
Here I’ll share my own experiences, the latest evidence, practical tips and honest conversations about the challenges many women face but often don’t talk about.
I’ll be journaling my own journey through perimenopause, menopause and eventually post-menopause, the successes, the setbacks, the lessons and everything in between.
I can’t change the journey I’ve already lived, but if sharing my story helps even one woman understand her body sooner than I did, then every lesson has been worthwhile.
My hope is that if another woman finds herself wondering, “Is this normal?” or “Why didn’t anyone tell me this?”, she’ll find reassurance here. I want this to be a place where women feel seen, supported and understood—a place where we can learn from one another and realise that none of us has to go through this stage of life alone.
Turning 50 wasn’t the end of my story.
It was the beginning of finally choosing myself.
Welcome to 50 & Thriving.
I’m Ilze, and this is my journey. I hope it inspires you to begin—or continue—your own. Welcome to 50 & Thriving.
I’m so glad you’re here.
